Hey! Been a while. Honestly don't know what to talk about much here, but I've logged off of Tumblr for a while for the sake of my mental health and am feeling the itch to just Talk so here I am.

As I'm writing I'm realizing I might actually have quite a bit to talk about because I never actually talked about my trip to Puerto Rico! It was. Well. It sure was.

Before we even left the airport, my mom fell and hit her head in the parking lot, which sure didn't bode well for the rest of the trip lmao (don't worry she's fine now, had no signs of a concussion or anything at the time and has healed from it by now.) We almost missed our flight because of it, but we thankfully made it. For more context we were already at the gate waiting to be boarded when my mom and stepdad were told that one of the tools he was taking to work on our house there wasn't allowed on the plane and that they had to take it back to the car or else they'd take it, so like. It was kinda the airport's fault because they'd checked to make sure they could take it beforehand but like. Whatever.

Then when we actually made it to the island we had issues with our rental car and we ended up having to take a taxi service, which would've been fine if the guy didn't drive like a maniac and actually get a speeding ticket while we were all in the car. I was already stressed out of my mind but that made it Worse.

In the end we did all get to our house there safe and really the rest of the trip wasn't That bad, we just didn't get to do all the fun stuff we wanted to do.

So that was that for the trip, after that things have been pretty uneventful. My boss had to cut everyone's hours at my job so I'm working a little less than I usually do. If I can get myself to start drawing a little more consistently again, I might consider opening up commissions to earn a bit of extra cash. Or maybe do something like a your character here kinda thing or something. No guarantees though.

Oh! I've also been getting into modded Minecraft! I've had a ton of fun with it so far, even though I haven't really installed too many mods yet. I even made myself a custom player model!

I basically came up with an OC on the spot to figure out how Blockbench and the custom player models mod worked. It doesn't have much concrete lore yet, or even a name, but I've been having fun playing pretend with it in my survival world as like, an amnesiac robot the awoke centuries after it was shut down for whatever reason. I started work on a werehog model too, though I'm not sure when I'll finish that one. Now that I'm working less hours, I'm hoping to have more time and energy to play and draw more often now (though I feel my energy for basically everything has been fluctuating a lot recently).

Last thing for today, I wanna show you all my cats! I think when I last posted a picture of either of them, Bonbon was still pretty small. He's grown SO much, like an absurd amount in the couple months since then, it's insane. Just look at him!

He looks about the same size as Chip in this picture, but he's so much heavier. He's like, human baby sized now (idk if that's a good point of comparison lol).

Anyway, that's all I've got for today. Bye bye!

Hey!

I've been wanting to write a new blog for a while, but I'm kind of at a loss for what to talk about lol. Though there has been some stuff happening in my life since I last wrote. Like... I bought my first car! With my own money!!! I still need to get my lisence (I'm still on my learner's permit), but it's still a pretty big achievement for me.

I've also been replaying Sonic Frontiers, though on my Steam Deck instead of my Switch. It looks soooo much better graphically AND I can mod it however I want! It's awesome!!

I'm properly getting back into the groove of drawing now too. My most recent piece was inspired by me replaying Frontiers again, but it's also a redraw of an older piece that's up on my old Tumblr art blog (here). I had a lot of fun just experimenting with my new style and designs, though at some point I started feeling like I was taking too long with it. I don't think I took about as much time as I usually did with my older pieces but I took multiple breaks with a couple days in between. I don't like taking so much time with my art, but I need to be more patient with myself. I have a job and other general life stuff that gets in the way. I can't keep expecting myself to draw as much and as often as I used to when I was younger.

Oh, also! I've been refreshing my memory on HTML and CSS a bit, and am working on a big site overhaul! It'll take a while though, but I hope to have a fresh version of the site next year. I wanna make it 3ds themed and make it more mobile friendly :]

That's all for now. 'Till next time!

Hey all, it's been a bit.

Hit a bit of a rough patch with my mental health. My drive to draw is pretty much entirely gone. I hesitate to call this art block because I'm not out of ideas but it's more like. I dunno. I don't want to actually do it?

It's kinda difficult for me to be truly "present" on the internet right now and talk about personal stuff. I mostly post random thoughts and reblog fanart on Tumblr but I'm not doing much creatively. I want to get back to it eventually bc there's things I wanna do with my OCs and the website but I feel like it's gonna be a while before I get back into a good enough space to make stuff again. Just gotta be patient with myself until I get there.

Though I haven't been making stuff, I've been playing games a lot. Silksong kinda consumed me for a bit until Sonic Racing Crossworlds came out, and now that's basically all I've been playing lol. Since I preordered I get to play as the werehog which is. literally the best thing ever. Would be even better if he had voicelines but there's already a mod for that so I might just install that lmao. Silkson is also INSANE but also stupid difficult. I've been having fun with it but I also find myself easily frustrated with some things so it might take me a while to beat.

In other news, remember the four kittens my family was fostering? We actually kept one!

His name is Bonbon. My little brother named him :]

Him and Chip are slowly getting along. They had a bit of a rough start since he's younger than her and a lot more playful while Chip is a lot more shy in comparison. But he's the sweetest the little thing, loves to cuddle and purrs SO loud. I love him.

It's kinda funny having these two kittens in the house now. My mom used to not like animals much (not that she disliked them, but she never wanted to get attached due to past experiences with other pets) but she's now head over heels with both of them. It makes me so happy to see her like that.

Ok that's all for now it's Sonic racing time.

So I started playing Pseudoregalia. God I love furry women.

Also started playing Nightmare Kart but I haven't gotten super into it yet. It's a funny game tho just like. In concept.

Anyway, been having a blast with those games so far, especially Pseudoregalia. I love games where you get thrown into the world and just get to explore and stuff. I should play more metroidvanias honestly, I really liked Hollow Knight even tho I never beat it. I just like wandering around lmao.

Sybil is peak character design also.

Also been trying to play more Unleashed, but I ran into my first medal collecting roadblock and I straight up looked up how to mod this game just to remove that almost immediately. I am not good enough at the game nor patient enough to comb through every level just to get some more medals. I'm just here for the Werehog (kidding, I wanna experience everything the game has to offer too, but like. I'm not collecting medals to do that.)

I keep running into a weird glitch where the A button imput gets swapped with the start button imput seemingly at random?? So that definitely slows down my progress with Unleashed. Idk if it's just a Steam Deck thing. It probably is.

Don't have many life updates, except...

We're fostering kittens!! Look at them!!

My mom found them in our backyard. A cat in our neighborhood had them there, but she took them in bc she was worried a wild animal might attack them or something. She'd been watching them for a while too and their mom seemingly didn't care for them all that much and didn't come to our backyard very often. I think she might be someone's outdoor cat or something.

We already know of ppl who want cats so we're gonna give them away. We don't really have the means to take care of all four of them rn. My mom is considering keeping one tho (she got attached to one of the white ones) but we need to see how Chip reacts to having other cats around. So far, not that well, suprisingly, so we'll see.

Last thing I wanna talk about, I have the itch to rebuild the whole site again. I want it to be more werehog themed, and I'd like to redraw some assets and stuff and make it more responsive so it looks and works better on mobile. But I wanna try to learn at least some javascript first, and honestly, I'm not really in a good enough mental state to like. Learn things on my own rn. So it's not something that's happening soon. Might do the assets soon tho (finally gonna draw those chibis I wanted to do for the OC page) and maybe change some colors and bg image and header. Smaller changes that don't require a whole site rebuild.

Alright gonna go lie down and play more Pseudoregalia bye :]

Been a while since I wrote a big blog post, huh? Life's been kinda busy. Haven't had it in me to be very present online, especially with that family trip and stuff.

Speaking of, it was fine. Turns out that friend I haven't seen in like a decade is almost EXACTLY like me, similar interests and all. We got along pretty well. Just wish things weren't so. overwhelming. like in general.

The Florida heat was bad enough, but being around a kid (sometimes two) who never shut up, going to places with a shit ton of people and noise, it's all so overstimulating and exhausting. It's why I don't like going on trips like this.

But overall, it was fine. And I treated myself to a Sonic Lego set (the one with the biolizard :]) so not all of it was bad.

Anyways, talking about something else. I'm experimenting a bit with my style, using a different brush for shading and softening it up again. I used to have a softer shading style, and what I did in my most recent drawings is kinda similar to that, but I'm also messing around with different color overlays and gradient maps too. The highlights are kinda close to what I was doing recently, but I also added some subtler ones for a bit more depth. It's something I felt I was missing from my current style that I used to do with my old work. It was fun trying something kinda different.

I'm done rambling now. Here's a picture of Chip to end this one off. 'Till next time :]

Hiiiiii it's been kind of a while hasn't it? I don't have any new art to share as of now, haven't really had it in my to draw at all lately. Work has been particulatly exhausting with my schedule changing unexpectedly, but things are going back to normal so I should have some more time and energy for that soon.

I have ideas though, especially for stuff with my OCs. I wanna update my personal Sonic design, and sketch out some timeskip designs I've had rattling around in my head for Rue, Specter, and Phantom. I also wanna get into maybe doing bigger illustrations showing my OCs day-to-day lives similar to the monthly Sonic Pict illustrations Sonic Channel puts out. Not sure I could do many of those, but I wanna try drawing things with like. actual environments and stuff (which I suck at but like the point is to practice and get better at those y'know).

In other news, I actually got a Steam Deck for my birthday! Yippee! Being able to play games that were once locked to my computer on the go is awesome, and like. having them run super smoothly without killing the battery in an hour is a plus. I haven't played many of the actual Steam games I own tho because I got FUCKING SONIC UNLEASHED RECOMPILED ON THERE BABY. I CAN FINALLY EXPERIENCE UNLEASHED HD FOR MYSELF AFTER WANTING TO FOR LITERAL YEARS. I GET TO SEE MY BOY (the werehog) IN HD. GOES CRAZY.

I also have Deltarune chapters 3 and 4 now and am going to be playing those too :] I got those on Switch tho because I have the save with the first two shadow crystals on there and not on pc so I'd rather continue with that one. I'm not playing blind but I'm excited regardless because like. It's just a good fucking game.

Last thing I wanna talk about today- we're going on a trip out of state next month to see family and I'm. Not all that excited. Like it's somewhere I've never been to and it's an almost 12 hour drive I think and ugh that just sounds exhausting. I never liked traveling all that much even to places I theoretically would like to visit because the trip itself is always such a drag. That and we're constantly doing things and I hardly get any good rest like ever when we travel and I just end up being tired the whole time. But we're also seeing people we haven't seen in a long time, and I might even get to see a friend from school that I haven't seen in YEARS (like since before moving to the US when I was 11) so that's exciting.

Anyways. awoof (Idk how to end this one off lmao bye)

Been meaning to write for a bit, so here I am! I don't have that much to talk about though, so this one's gonna be a bit shorter than usual.

So if you haven't noticed by my most recent art pieces, I am brainrotting over a new Sonic AU. Basically Sonic gets roboticized by Eggman and is used as a weapon against his friends while he's fully aware and trying to stop it. I love putting this guy in the torment nexus it's so fun.

I've been rambling a lot about it on my Tumblr, which is probably where I'm gonna keep fandom-related rambles and stuff. It's just easier to post thoughts when they come to me over there. Anyway, I love making Sonic experience The Horrors (total loss of autonomy).

In other news, I recently replayed Deltarune chapters 1 and 2 and they are so peak. I couldn't resist the urge to look at spoilers for 3 and 4 though so I'm watching a playthrough as I write. It looks SO fun though and I can't wait to play it myself.

I'm also SUPER excited for Sonic Racing Crossworlds. LIKE!!! THEY PUT MIKU IN IT!!!! AND THE WEREHOG!!!!!!! I'm genuinely considering pre-ordering a game for the first time and it's SOLELY because of werehog. I need creature in a silly car. Thinking of getting it for Switch but I also think it might be time to finally maybe get a Steam Deck? I feel like the game would probably run better there than on my Switch Lite or my laptop. It's more money but my bday's coming up on the 24th so I miiiight be able to get it? We'll see.

That's all I wanna talk about right now. See y'all whenever I have the time to update again! Also happy pride!!!! Yippee!!!!

Finally have a bit of time to sit down and write an update, so here we are! Work has been draining and I haven't had much time or energy to draw recently so I don't have much to share right now, but I have a couple ideas so I hope I have it in me to draw some stuff this weekend. I do have my hands a bit full right now though, because...

I have a new kitten!

Her name is Chip (yes like Chip from Sonic Unleashed what do you expect from me) and I love her so so so much. She is SO itty bitty right now. Like about a month old. I think she might be a tortie, but I'm not super sure since her colors are so muted still. She's mostly gray with little patches of orange.

She actually had her first vet visit yesterday, and she's in pretty good health for the most part. Unfortunately she does have worms which I already suspected because her belly has been a bit bloated, but she's getting medicine for that and is otherwise eating well and being super playful.

She's just the sweetest thing. Sometimes I'll pick her up after a play session and make purring noises and she'll fall asleep in my arms. Just today she fell asleep and kept sleeping for a while after I put her in my lap. I damn near cried. Literally who decided kittens had to be the softest most adorable things in the universe

She's the first kitten I've ever had, so I'm super excited to see her grow up :]

In other news, my job is exhausting! So here's a quick PSA for people who go to shoe stores, from a person who works in one.

For the love of god don't jam the fucking cardboard inserts back into the shoes they are not going to go back in correctly. Don't put them inside the box either it's not going to close properly. And most importantly DON'T JUST LEAVE THEM LYING AROUND ON THE FLOOR OR ON THE SEATS JUST THROW THEM AWAY IN A TRASH BIN. IF YOU DON'T SEE ONE JUST ASK.

ALSO don't leave the FUCKING SHOE BOXES LYING AROUND EITHER OH MY GOD. Please I beg put them back where you found them and if you can't do that at least leave them somewhere neatly or again just ask an employee. PUT DISPLAYS BACK WHERE YOU FOUND THEM TOO PLEASE I am begging you. Make our jobs easier please I should not have to clean up after grown ass adults so much. This is both common sense and basic sympathy. If your ass is leaving a mess I am exploding you with my mind.

OKAYYYY that's it for today I have a headache and should probably go to bed soon. Good Bye

I now have a new little critter in my cast of characters that I'm totally going to draw regularly, Mellow Mimi!

I've been going through a rough patch. Work is difficult, one of my aunts died not long after an uncle got deported, and to top it all off, my stepsister randomly decided to come back to the house after months of being away JUST to take Luna away to live with her mom. Because she "missed her".

Even though I was the one who cared for Luna every day and she didn't even bother to check in to see if Luna was being fed. And that's after barely doing anything for her while she still lived with us.

There's nothing I can do about it, either, since my stepsister (or stepbrother, can't remember which) adopted her before moving in with us after mom got together with stepdad. Legally, Luna is theirs.

So yeah. Not doing too great. Really in need of something comforting right now. So I made Mimi just for that.

They're partially inspired by a cute blindbox doll I saw while scrolling yt shorts. It was a cat kemonomimi with a big tv head. While designing Mimi, I was originally gonna make them an android or doll, but I ended up making them a plushie. It's more fitting for a character that's meant to be soft and comforting for both myself and hopefully others.

I also really like lolita fashion (especially ouji lolita) and have a soft spot for clowncore stuff, so I kinda meshed those two together with a pastel color palette.

They are also kinda inspired by two furry characters I have that I don't draw anymore. They were both androids and I had lore for them and everthing, but I never managed to do anything with them, so I stopped using them altogether. Mimi doesn't have any real lore as of now, they're just there for me to draw cute stuff with pastels, so I think it'll be easier for me to actually make stuff for them.

In other news, the website overhaul is mostly complete when it comes to coding and stuff, all I need is to draw some assets for it. I'm only making two pagedolls this time, but I want to make chibis for the ocs page, a drawing of myself (as in, my sona) for the about page, and one for the new entry page as well (clicking on it will let you enter the site)! I'm hoping to have that done soon.

I also went back to tumblr recently, but I'm trying to keep myself from being on there too much. I used to be on there like. A Lot. Almost constantly actually. It was bad. So I'm not posting my recent art there, at least not yet. I'm just reblogging cool stuff I see and looking at mutual's stuff I missed (I MISSED THEM SO BAD....)

I think that's all for now. Hopefully the next major update is gonna be the big overhaul :]

So I may or may not have started learning html recently and I gotta say, it's been pretty fun so far! This site might be getting a big overhaul at some point in the near future. I know it hasn't been THAT long since I made the site, but since I kept running into issues with the way I worked on it (mostly just copy-pasting stuff), I wanted to actually understand how html and css work better. I haven't been at it for that long but I feel way more confident in my skills.

In learning, I decided to use an external html editor that allows me to see a live preview of my site as I work on it, which helps A TON. Now I don't have to constantly press the save and view buttons on Neocities' html editor to make sure everything works. I've already built a couple pages for the new version of the site, thought I'm going to keep at it for now until I can get the site just how I want it. It probably won't be uploaded here for a while, but I've been having a blast with it so far!

I'm still gonna upload any art I make in the meantime to this version of the site, and still upload blogs and stuff, thought I probably won't be making major updates here. I'll also transfer all art, blogs and oc profiles to the new version, and will be keeping this version of the site available once the new one is up, so nothing will be lost! I'm also adding the about page I said I wanted to add last time to the new site, as well as a resources page with links for the stuff I used to help build it!

Honestly all of this has been super exciting for me. I love learning new fun things!!! And making things!!! I love creating!!!!!! It's also been a nice thing to pass time and unwind after work. I wanna continue working on it and even making more of my own assets and such, like new pagedolls and a unique background and maybe even a header. I'm not super sure about all the little details I wanna add just yet, and it's likely I'll be adding more after the site's up.

If you had told me a couple years ago that I would be learning to code and building my own website from scratch, I would have laughed in your face. I never thought I'd get here.

Unrelated, but I also read Is Love The Answer? by Uta Isaki and like. wow. Good shit.

Anyway I think that's all I wanna talk about today. Leaning new skills is fun :]

Very tired today, but I have Thoughts and I wanna talk about them.

So i'm considering adding an about page so people can know a bit more about. y'know. me. This is a personal website after all, and I wanna add things that make it More Personal.

I also wanna add more widgets and stuff, but I tried adding one that shows the current phase of the moon and it didn't work lol. Which is weird because it's an iframe and the cbox (which is also an iframe) works just fine but like idk what I'm doing Ever. I'm also too tired to care much. Maybe I'll try some other time.

I've also started thinking about an old fully original project called Eterna. It was a worldbuilding/story thing with a couple OCs tied to it. I kinda wanna redesign them (again) but I'm worried I'll end up not doing anything substantial with it. I only ever got to redesign characters a couple times and talk about some of the lore on Tumblr, but it was (and still is) kinda half-baked. Maybe I'll find enough time and motivation to do something with it. I miss those characters and genuinely wanna bring them back but I honestly have a hard time balancing multiple creative projects + irl shit. So who knows.

Speaking of not having time and motivation Jesus fuck am I tired of my job already. Maybe that's on me for choosing a job at [insert name brand] shoe store and not something more slower-paced as my first job but like. Holy shit it's rough. I'm exhausted and I literally just started like. a couple months ago.

Then again it was the first job I applied to that actually went past the application phase and gave me an interview (which I FUMBLED SUPER HARD BTW IDK HOW I GOT HERE) so I might not even HAVE a job today if I didn't. So.

Anyway. I'm experiencing critical levels of eepy right now. Probably gonna go to bed early. Everyone say hi to Luna I don't have a picture of her this time but she is watching me as I type this lol

Wanna talk about different things today. First- I played Ena Dream BBQ recently.

You may have noticed by the fact that there is a little polygonal Creature now in my gallery.

It might be pretty much all I can think about right now. Ena has my brain on a chokehold. Specifically BBQ Ena. One of the most appealing character designs I have ever seen that doesn't fall under the big fluffy beast category. I want to eat her.

Anyway I based the design heavily on Sonic the Werehog because OF COURSE. Also made them as furry as an ena could possibly be. The other side tho is mostly based on Merlina from SATBK. I took characters from my two favorite Sonic game stories and slapped them together into one silly little guy.

Honestly cannot wait for the next chapter because the surrealist art and themes scratch an itch in my brain I didn't know I had. I already beat chapter one multiple times and I want to get all the achievements available so far. I need to see EVERYTHING it has to offer. That's probably the highest compliment a game can get from me.

Second thing I wanna talk about, totally unrelated to the first thing- I guess I just wanna vent about some confusing feelings.

Sometimes I hate having certain features. Particularly my breasts. I don't like them. I don't want them on me. I would much rather have a flatter chest. It's why I draw my sona without them.

But sometimes they're... fine? Like I go a while without really thinking about it and not really hating them. But then the thought hits and it's like "Oh :/".

I wear a binder when I can, which is not all that often to be honest. Mostly when I go out with my family to eat or something because I know we won't be out too long (I can't stand having anything itchy on for long). But the majority of the time when I'm home or at work I just wear bras.

I think it doesn't help that I'm not out as genderqueer to most people I know irl. I'm only really out to my mom, and while she's supportive, I don't think she really Gets It, y'know? Not like I need her to, but like. I'd be nice if I knew more people irl who did.

That was kind of a tangent. Anyway, sometimes I consider surgery (whenever I'm independent enough and have enought savings for it, that is) but I'm also scared of regretting it. Though I'm always scared of making decisions like that I guess. Because I feel like I can live with my body as it is. I don't LIKE it, but I can live with it. But do I WANT to?

I don't know. Though I guess there's no real point in worrying about it too much, since I can't do anything about it.

It still makes me wanna bash my head into a wall.

Anyway (how many times have I said that now? Three?) I don't wanna end my second ever blog on a sour note, so here's a picture of Luna reading PEAK (dunmeshi) with me. She has good taste.

First blog moment! Honestly not super sure what to talk about? Idk what ppl do for these things tbh. Do I just like. ramble? I wanna ramble. I like doing that.

I think I'll just talk about some of my art first! Specifically the monochrome Sonic + Dark Sonic pieces bc there's some context to them ppl aren't getting with just the drawings alone.

To start, they're pretty much almost entirely inspired by In Stars and Time. I played it, enjoyed it thouroughly, and thought "I wanna see Sonic going through that. Put Sonic through The Horrors (timeloop)."

There's like. an entire story in my head for this. I tried writing it, and got to like chapter 3 before the brainrot died down. I want to keep going with it but idk. I got to a point with it where I was criticizing literally everything about what I'd written so far so. who knows lmao.

Wouldn't be the first time it's happened tbh. I had another multi-chapter fic I'd posted on Tumblr called Project: New Moon (real ones remember) and I actually finished it and was super proud of it for a while. But after some time I started to hate everything about it and stopped updating the blog altogether. And that's the one I actually finished. The previous versions of the story (called Sonic Eclipse) never got to the ending for pretty much the same reasons.

So anyway, back to the art. It's got heavy inspo from ISAT, so Dark Sonic in these pieces represents something similar to [BIG ENDGAME SPOILER]. He's not really like. a person? More like a manifestation in Sonic's brain embodying his repressed trauma and bottled up negative emotions. The hedgehog has gone through a lot, so I like the idea of him having a moment when he's a bit older, where he finally just. breaks. The mask he didn't even know he wore starts cracking bit by bit until it shatters and all of the things he kept inside for years start to spill out. And it manifests as a dark image of himself in his mind that tries to kill him like. metaphorically.

I'm so normal chat (lying)

Tbh I also kinda just like drawing him scared. I like pushing his expressions in a way you don't typically see in official stuff, so finding ways to make extreme emotions work on him is just a good drawing excercise. And I wanted to draw Dark Sonic again also. He's cool. Sega should do something with him like genuinely it would go so hard.

Alright, I think I'm done rambling for today. Have a picture of my cat that I really like (her name is Luna :])